May you live happily ever after, customer

I answered the phone this morning to what can only be described as a stock fairy tale character. She was older and, in my mind, she looked like Cinderella's fairy godmother.
In fact, Susan was just one "bippity boppity boo" away from hearing me beg for my avocados to be turned into three and a half Mini Coopers, each a different color. (The half Mini would be set up someplace inside my apartment as quirky decor. Kind of like those people who have old phone booths in their kitchens and shit. Why? Because, it is an outside thing that has been brought inside, and you can get inside of said thing. And that is adorable. Port-o-potty in your den, anyone?)

I asked for her contact information, which was normal/boring, and half expected her to list her address as "The Shoe" or maybe she'd say something like, "I just live amongst sheep and geese." Her address was standard, which was depressing. Her email address, though, was something like 'majormamoo@yahoo' which really thrilled me. Not only do we have a woman from a fable or fantasy living in St. Charles, Illinois, but she is married to a military man from space! Perhaps he's an alien. They share life and an email address, and that was probably the coolest fucking wedding ever not attended by yours truly.

This woman did, however, baffle me with her order.

Susan: I would like to get tickets for April the 8th.
Me: Okay, how many do you need?
Susan: What do you think?
Me:...I'm sorry?
Susan: Well, what would you say?
Me: Um...I guess I would say...how...many...do you...need?
Susan: Mmm hmm.
Me: I mean, how many friends are you bringing?
Susan: Well, I just thought you were going to tell me you only have two tickets available, perhaps only one.
Me: No, ma'am. There are currently 140 available.
Susan: Oh! [insert adorable (typical) old lady, closed-mouth chuckle here] Well, you have been great, and I will take three!

Any other person acting this ridiculous would have pissed all over my morning. But, when people come from other realms, you have to let things like this slide. It's not stupidity or weirdness if she doesn't understand the ways of the non-fantastical world, ya know? We can't do magic here. That is foreign to her. How fascinating!

I guess that was my moral.