Now we both have big girl jobs of great importance and we look like this:
Our friendship is mostly conducted during the work day over Gchat and it goes like this:
me: Si, but I'm 'bout ta go ta Walgreen's
Emily: that's like spanghetto
Sent at 12:26 PM on Thursday
Emily: so i am curious about this Braca testing or whatver it is called have you seen it... the blood work that shows your chances of ovarian or breast cancer.
me: Oh, yeah
Emily: i've got both running from both sides and i just know it's coming
but i mean what would you do if this blood work is like 100 percent?
just go ahead and take everythig out??
but what if that's how i'm supposed to go and i end up final destination-ing myself up??
me: hahaha
Emily: i don't think we are supposed to know that type of thing.
me: Yeah we probably aren't.
I mean.. what do you do but wait for it to strike at that point?
Emily: exactly
me: Every time you have one little pain or weird feeling, you're going to be at the doctor and the conspiracy theorist in me says taht's all it's for.
Because doctors really need money, Emily. They simply don't have enough yachts.
Emily: and i don't think insurance will just pay for me to get new boobs becuase my current ones are faulty.
Sent at 12:38 PM on Thursday
Emily: so when people talk about stuffing it kinds grosses me out i don't want to eat something that cooked inside the bird and it all mushy
Sent at 12:39 PM on Thursday
Emily: you know what we don't need... a jersey wedding show. vh1. we don't need it
me: Oh, Christ. No.
Sent at 12:54 PM on Thursday
me: Emily. Is Brad Pitt really THAT good looking?
Emily: i don't think he is the end all be all, but he ain't ugly.
me: Right.
Emily: he is no jon hamm.
Sent at 12:57 PM on Thursday
me: I just sold a gift certificate to a stylish and wonderful gay man
Emily: sounds a lot better than the angry gay man russell who just yelled at me because i told him his church bells ringtone was annoying.
then i stole a tootsie pop.
burn.
[BLANK] has got to be the most boring person on the face of facebook.
me: You just burned that gay man AND [BLANK].
Sent at 1:11 PM on Thursday
me: HA! Lina is going to Ikea with one of the girls from the theater and I told her to text me pictures as if she's going on a vacation somewhere.
Emily: exciting stuff you never know what you'll see though
me: It's true!
Sent at 1:17 PM on Thursday
Emily: [sends a link for a product--a ginger lollipop that eases morning sickness for pregnant women]
me: If I just have a hangover will they work for me?
Emily: maaayyybe.
i wonder what a ginger lollipop tastes like
gross in my head.
but i do like gingerale
Sent at 1:23 PM on Thursday
Emily: oh well everytime i do something mariah carey decides she needs to do it too
me: Name 12 instances in which this occured
Emily: 1. the time i wanted to make a movie and call it sparkle... she did glitter....
Emily: ok i can't keep on
me: hahahahhaha
That's all you've got. You are WEAK!
Sent at 1:42 PM on Thursday
me: Damn he was cute!
And so charmin
HAHAHHAHAHA
me: He was a toilet paper
Sent at 1:44 PM on Thursday
Emily: ok so in the past few minutes i've gotten invites to go seen hanson and nkotb. separately.
heavily considering hanson.
me: That's awesome
Sent at 2:14pm on Thursday
Emily: all i see is her one pic
me: ball ass
Emily: taint
that a bitch
Sent at 2:32 PM on Thursday
Emily: hey know what i can't stand on facebook....
but when people get a lot of pictures from something recent and change thier profile every hour to a new one
Sent at 2:39 PM on Thursday
Emily: ...she is 36 years old
and she thinks vitamins make you fat.
and she won't leave her house without her husbnad
me: I know. That's why I said this to you
This chick just called here b/c she had a ticket but she meant to buy for Toronto. I ask for her name and she just says "Susie"
Really?!
Emily: why does she take a pic of sarah jessica parker to the salon and think her asian hair will do it, then get mad when it looks exactly the same as before
me: You think I can seach the MILLIONS of orders we have if you just give me "susie"?
Sent at 2:44pm on Thursday
Emily: weny's dad won't let her get an american passport or take her husband's last name.
her last name is currently tanuwidjaja, it could be lam.
me: wow.
Emily: i can only pronounce one of them
i said weny you live in a whole other country. you can do what you want
no no no no no
if i see that mcrib commerercial one more time i'm going to kick ronald mcdonald in the balls
so gross.
me: I know!
Sent at 2:56 PM on Thursday
Emily: hoda+kathielee+mchale=giggles.
me: I like math a lot
Emily: i cna't wait til i get old and can act like kathie lee and people are just like oh she's old and drunk
me: I know!!! Emily, it's my dream
me: I already drink my body's worth of water in wine
(That was a good sentence)
Emily: that is some math
me: I think I have to blog about our chat today. We've had some moments.
I don't know if I should leave out the racism though.
Emily: eeeehhh maybe
we don't mean it for real mean, but other people don't know that
me: do you have that pic of me and you sitting on the counter in your mom's kitchen from 1997 saved on your computer?
Emily: looking..... while listening to tootsie roll
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