There it is. A happy family of four enjoying A Bug's Life or some shit. I don't identify with this and I think Netflix would be doing themselves a favor by switching it up a bit. We can keep the family. I'm sure some people are that vanilla and mundane. But here are some other options for the company so that they may, in fact, appeal to their core demographic.
Dude with no direction
This poor bastard is covered in potato chip crumbs and there's a half-eaten Tombstone (Yeah, it ain't even Digiorno) pizza on the table. The pizza is surrounded by Netflix envelopes. He is probably watching action movies. He may even be watching Die Hard for the millionth time because he is too cheap to buy it. He should probably be slapped in the mouth for wasting his Netflix money on the same DVDs repeatedly. He has no girlfriend. He wants one, but the girl he's chasing is not interested and he isn't taking hints. He does not shower regularly.
Miserable couple
No doubt these two need couple's therapy. They are watching something terrible together. It's probably a movie they bonded over like, Benny & Joon. She told him at the party when they met that she loved this movie and he pretended to love it too because she was showing a lot of cleavage that night. Now it's four years in, they both feel stuck, and they haven't had sex (with one another) in months. He was a dumbass and said something like, "This is stupid!" when Johnny Depp took the dinner rolls and stabbed them with forks, making them dance. And the girl said something like, "I thought you loved this movie. That's why I picked this one. I can't believe this. It's like I don't even know you." She knows damn good and well that there are no straight men on the planet (Well, there may be one) who like this movie and this was all a ploy to get her into bed four years ago, but she has been kidding herself. Women, we often believe the stupid shit men say when they want sex and, really, it must stop.
The lonesome dove
This could be depicted as a man or a woman. If you want to do a split screen photo, Netflix, I have no problem with that, but you'll have to be really distinct about it. For example, the chick's apartment must be decorated in bright colors and the lighting must be in contrast to that of the dude's. Otherwise, people will think this is a photo of the miserable couple from earlier, because these two lonely sad sacks are crying their pitiful eyes out. They're both watching Love Actually and it isn't even Christmas. The guy is imagining he's Colin Firth. Someday his cleaning lady will fall for him even though she speak "No English." Then he remembers his cleaning lady is not beautiful like Firth's girlfriend in the movie. Then he realizes his cleaning lady is in fact his mother when she comes over for her biweekly visit. Then he cries some more. The girl, in turn, dreams of being Martine McCutcheon's character. She's the girl who falls for Hugh Grant who is the Prime Minister in the film. Only this Netflix customer would rather fall for someone less boushie than Hugh Grant. (Readers: someone who is "boushie" acts like both a douche and a bitch.)
The Cynic
This bitch does not believe in any thing she's watching right now. It is probably some fantasy movie her nerdy friend told her to check out and her face looks like something just died right under her nose. And the stench is killing her. The only reason she is suffering through this is because her roller derby team decided not to meet tonight, because one of the girls broke up with her girlfriend and wants to be girlfriends with another girl on the team who already has a boyfriend. This chick couldn't deal with that drama, so she's watching Avatar and thinking about punching people in the neck.
Marisol
She's dressed like a cross between Phoebe from "Friends" and someone who is late for their shift at the Renaissance Festival. She is watching The English Patient because she, apparently, hates herself.
The Drunk
She is surrounded by wine bottles and a couple beers. I hope she has vodka some there too. She may even be stoned, but they probably won't depict that. She's watching every episode of "Full House". She is supremely awesome.
The Stoner
You know exactly what he's doing. Surrounded by buddies and a cloud of smoke, he is watching something awesomely stupid or deeply intelligent. Or something awesomely stupid that he views as deeply intelligent due to his current state. He is laughing hysterically, which means it is probably a drama, but I can't be bothered to name the movie at this time. His shirt is black with bleach stains and there is a comic book character on the front.
The Emotional Eater
She's got her cooking spoon in a carton of Ben and Jerry's and a bottle of chocolate sauce next to her Diet Coke just in case things get really terrible. She's holding a cat. She's watching Marley and Me and needs a hug. Her pajamas are from Victoria's Secret, but she got them on sale.
The "Intellectual"
This guy pretends to be smart to lure in ladies, so he is watching a documentary about something he does not understand. He looks confused, because he is confused. He is eating carrots and hummus. His shirt is pressed, which is weird for a straight dude.
I could come up with more...
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